A proposal to the field
The 2026 Mutual Match Standard.
Twelve things a surrogacy program can do so that both sides of a match are actually choosing. None of them require new technology. Most require only that a program stop treating one side as the customer and the other as the inventory.
Not a certification
This is not a badge, a seal or a paid membership. There is no fee, no logo to license and no register of approved providers. It is a set of practices we think the field should adopt, published so that intended parents and carriers can ask any program whether it meets them.
Updated July 29, 2026 · Reviewed by Patriot Conceptions Editorial Team
The standard
Twelve commitments.
Both sides receive a real profile
A carrier profile and an intended-parent profile should each carry identity-safe, decision-relevant information, clear authorship and a recent verification date. Today the information usually runs one way.
Availability is dated
Every distributed carrier profile states the screening stage reached and the date availability was last confirmed. A profile without a date is inventory, not an opportunity.
The introduction is mutual
Neither side is told the other has already chosen them before both have independently accepted the introduction. Being told you were picked changes what you feel free to ask.
Autonomy is explicit
Pre-match education states plainly that the gestational carrier controls consent to her own medical care. Values are aligned before transfer, and pressure is never used as a substitute for alignment.
Compensation is discussable
Programs do not require carriers to perform altruism or intended parents to pretend money is irrelevant. Terms, reimbursement timing and dispute paths are written down and shared.
Readiness is verifiable without oversharing
Identity, clinic and embryo status, legal, financial, insurance and support readiness can all be verified without exposing account balances, salary or unnecessary medical detail.
The carrier’s household is part of planning
Her spouse or partner, her children, childcare, lost wages, privacy and postpartum recovery are addressed before the match, not improvised during a complication.
Relationship words become behaviours
Close, family-like, private and communicative are translated into specifics: contact cadence, appointment attendance, which channels, social media, and what happens after birth.
Operations are measurable
Programs publish defined response, reimbursement, profile-verification and escalation standards, plus aggregate performance where the numbers are reliable and the method is stated.
Expectations are revisited
The match agreement is revisited after legal clearance, at pregnancy confirmation, in the third trimester and after birth. People may refine preferences without being accused of going back on their word.
The child’s story is planned
The parties discuss age-appropriate disclosure, donor and carrier terminology, record retention and possible future contact — without promising a donor’s identity can stay hidden permanently.
Complaints are independent
Each side has a route to raise a concern that does not run through the shared coordinator or the person who sold them the program.
Where we stand
We have not published our own commitments yet.
It would be easy to publish this standard and immediately claim we meet all twelve points. We are not doing that. A commitment a program cannot meet on a bad week is worse than no commitment, because the person who relied on it is the one who pays for the gap.
We are working through which of these we can meet consistently, with a defined measurement behind each one, and we will publish that list alongside the study findings rather than ahead of them. If you want to hold us to a specific point in the meantime, ask us directly.
An open invitation
Use it, argue with it, improve it.
Any program is free to adopt these practices without telling us. Intended parents and carriers are free to use them as a question list. If you think one of the twelve is wrong, we would rather hear it than have a standard nobody contests.