Preparing for Your Surrogacy Journey: A Checklist for Intended Parents

TL;DR: Surrogacy planning goes much smoother when you treat it like a coordinated project: medical plan, legal plan, financial plan, and communication plan. This checklist helps you prepare the key decisions before matching—so you can move through the process with fewer surprises and less stress.

The intended parent checklist (before you match)

1) Clarify your family goals (the “north star”)

• Are you planning for one child now, or future siblings too?
• Do you have timing constraints (age, work, personal)?
• What values are important (genetic connection, openness, privacy, etc.)?

2) Choose your core team early

Surrogacy is multi-disciplinary. Most intended parents work with:

• a fertility clinic (IVF/embryo planning),
• a surrogacy agency (matching and ongoing coordination),
• an assisted reproduction attorney (contracts + parentage),
• optional specialists (insurance/escrow, counseling/support).

Start here:

• Intended parents basics: /intended-parents/basics
• Intended parents process: /intended-parents/process

3) Map the medical plan (and the embryo plan)

Even if you’ve done IVF before, align on:

• where embryos will be created and stored,
• whether you’re considering donor eggs/embryos,
• what the transfer plan looks like (clinic protocol, monitoring, timing).

4) Build a realistic financial plan

Surrogacy costs are multi-part (medical, legal, insurance, surrogate compensation/support, escrow, and contingency).

Helpful resources:

• Intended parents cost: /intended-parents/cost
• Intended parents financing: /intended-parents/financing
• Surrogacy cost calculator: /tools/surrogacy-cost-calculator

5) Understand the legal and state-law context

Surrogacy laws and parentage steps vary by state. Before matching, clarify:

• which state(s) are involved (your location, surrogate’s location, delivery state),
• what parentage steps are typical (for example, pre-birth orders where applicable),
• what timelines and documentation are required.

Start here:

• Laws and policies hub: /surrogacy/laws-and-policies

6) Plan communication and expectations (it’s a success factor)

The healthiest journeys tend to include early alignment on:

• communication style and frequency,
• boundaries and privacy preferences,
• expectations around pregnancy updates and milestones,
• how you’ll plan for delivery day and postpartum recovery.

If you want a full overview of the journey structure:

• Surrogacy process: /surrogacy/process

If you’re a single intended parent (extra planning considerations)

Many single intended parents build families through surrogacy. A few extra checklist items can reduce stress:

• Ensure you have practical support lined up for travel, newborn care, and logistics.
• Plan for paperwork and parentage steps early (these vary by state).
• Decide how you want to handle communication and boundaries during and after pregnancy.

Next steps

If you’re ready to plan your journey, contact Patriot Conceptions. We can help you map your next steps and build a timeline that aligns with your goals.